Christine

My Mother's Knowledge

2011-09-27T15:11:00.002-07:00

As time continually progresses, the more I realize how much my mom taught me. I find myself recalling so often things that she would say to me. I treasure the things that she taught me. I treasure the advice that I received. Imparting her words and knowledge keeps her alive.

She taught me things that to this day make me laugh: I remember one time I went to Wal-Mart with her and we decided to get a donut before shopping. We ate them and my mom said, "Ya know, I think the least that Wal-Mart owes me is a donut for me doing my shopping here."
I couldn’t agree more. And to this day I don’t feel any guilt when I enjoy myself a donut at the store.

My mom had common sense: She always said, "Money is meant to be spent and cars are meant to be driven"
Thus, why I don't always feel guilty when I spend money or drive far too much.

In going through her trials and sickness she said. "I think I knew what I was in for in the pre-earth life and what was to come and the trials I would face and I accepted them to be able to have the chance to be with my children."
My mom understood the gospel in every way. She understood that she was foreordained to be my mom and to be an example in this life and to go through the trials that she had to endure. She went through this life with dignity and grace and style. She embraced those around her who were rarely embraced by others. She loved her husband in a way that he will never be the same while he is away from her. And she raised her children in a way that for the rest of our days we will cherish her and call her blessed.
I love you, mom. Beyond these words.

Old pictures

2011-06-19T21:16:00.000-07:00

i love to see my mom as a teenager. She is so pretty!

Changes

2011-05-08T22:32:00.002-07:00

Changes seem to be ever present in our lives. Over the course of just a few years it is hard to imagine all of the different circumstances that can change. When the loss of a parent happens in your family, one cannot fathom the changes that come with it. Four years later, I still think every day of how my life is different now that my mom is gone. Yet, our lives go on. We continue in work. We continue in school and continue in life. Changes can be embraced as we learn to grow from them. One thing that has not changed is the love that I have for my mom. Its incredible as time goes on, I love her more. I remember more of what she has taught me in this life. I realize more of how much a better person I am because she is my mother. I love her with every fiber of my being. I hold on to her and pray for the day I may be with her again. Happy Mother’s Day, mom.

Mothers Day 2011

2011-05-07T21:21:00.002-07:00

If my mom were here I would tell her how much I love her, how much I miss her, and how I cannot wait to live in a place where we will never be separated again! My heart aches and aches. I can't wait to love her again.

Remembering you

2011-03-11T21:45:00.002-07:00

Its been 4 years since my mom left us to join the angels. I miss her so. I can't wait to see her again. I have tremendous faith in that day and I know it won't be that long. Remembering you dear mom!

Moms 3rd grandchild gets babtized

2011-02-09T13:28:00.002-07:00

This weekend was a special weekend we were able to babtize Nick and celebrate his birthday. It went really well and I felt the spirit very strong and know that mom was there to witness this special event in Nick's life. She always had a soft spot for Nick and Nick does for her to. They really have a special bond. We missed moms physical presence but I know she was there in spirit.

2010-11-19T19:43:00.002-07:00

I miss mom so much at this time of year. I find myself having to really dig deep everyday to find happiness and contentment. I have a great life I'm very blessed but there is one thing missing and its my mom. Its hard to be truely happy without her. Her birthday is next week and thanksgiving, I was never without her on the holidays.

Another Fall..

2010-09-27T13:54:00.002-07:00

It seems that in every time of year and in every new season, memories and feelings of my mom are always associated. The way in which I miss my mom, the way in which I long to see her never changes. But when fall rolls around every year, these feelings become especially poignant. I have many fond memories of fall with my mom. I remember in St. George when I was in high school both of us had busy schedules, but quite often before my swim practices we would be home together for a short time in which we would sit outside in the sun and just soak in the beautiful fall weather. I remember the fall before I left for my mission. We spent so much quality time together. I reflect with sweet memories of that fall when I spent so much time with my mom. One of my best memories occurred in that same fall, the end of September four years ago. I went through the temple for the first time and what a wonderful time it was. The Spirit was very strong and I felt tremendous love for all of my family that day. I will never forget my mom on that special day. I remember seeing her dressed all in white, simply radiating. I remember the tears that were in her eyes as she said to me, "This is what it's going to be like" as we entered the gorgeous room in the temple. I hold very close to this memory that occurred four years ago. I long for the day in which I will see her radiating and beautiful in white once again.

My Mom's Beauty

2010-07-21T23:54:00.002-07:00

One of the many things that I miss about my mom is her profound beauty. I think anyone would agree that my mom had unparalleled beauty, grace, and style. I loved going places with my mom because of how pretty she always looked. I can’t remember her ever leaving the house without at least freshening up a bit in the bathroom. My mom wasn’t superficial; she just always liked looking her best for others. Recently my sisters and I received a great gift from a dear family friend. For about a year she took my mom’s clothes and made them into a quilt, personalized to each of us with articles of clothing that meant something to us. Sometimes I feel like I am forgetting the details of my mom, but in the occasions where I see her clothing; I remember exactly the moment in which she wore those pair of jeans. And exactly the way she looked in that shirt. A remarkable attribution to my mom is the way that her children adore her. I think there are few children that can remember to such a degree the way in which our mom’s lotion smelled, the clothes that she wore on certain occasions, the way she laughed, the way she would scream when Jenny would hug her and lift her up and countless other occasions of which we reflect upon often. What I am thankful for is that my mom’s spirit is ever-present. I am thankful that my mother’s beauty has transcended through to my beautiful sisters as well as their children. In the way that they raise their children, I know it is from my mom’s example that they do so. So often when they teach and talk to my nieces and nephews, I can hear my mom saying the same thing. I am thankful that we have all attained the fabulous social skills that were shown and taught to us by our mom as she would selflessly ask others about their lives and endeavors. I marvel at the similarities in the mannerisms when I see Susan and Barbara. I see and hear my mom every time I am with them. As I watch my sweet Grandparents, I understand how my mom was so great in this life because of their abundance of love and caring for all those around them. Through the power of the Holy Ghost my mom has worked through her children in order to help the other in a struggling time. Never have a felt so strongly that my mom loves her family and tries so hard so that we may always remember that. How I miss her so. How I love her so. But I know that through the tender mercies of the Lord, her beauty will always be around me to bear me up.

Memorial Day

2010-07-20T21:33:00.003-07:00

This is from memorial day 2010 We all went to St George. I got a picture of my dad at the grave his face it a total reflection of how he is really feeling. Its the look of pain and agony. I miss her and I still can't believ it sometimes.

Mothers Day

2010-05-10T19:56:00.002-07:00

Mothers Day is always bitter sweet. The bitter being that I cannot be with my mom and sweet because I am a mom. I try to focus on being a mom now, but I don't think your ever ready to not have your mom. The feelings that come to me are an extreme longing to see her be with her or talk with her. There is also a bit of enviousness of others buying gifts and flowers to give to their mothers.

My mom has such a sweet smile I think I miss that the most. Until we meet again mom. I love you.

Mom's 10th Grandchild

2010-04-26T09:54:00.003-07:00

About two months before mom passed away, me Jenny Shannon and Casey were sitting on moms bed with her. She new she was leaving and asked us all if we had any questions. Jenny was about 5 months pregnant at the time and I remember her response to mom the best. She was crying, she asked mom if she would be there when her baby was born. Mom looked at her and said "I'll hand her to you" we were all crying. I know mom hands us these new precious spirits after she gives them there last advice and love. The veil is very thin when babies come into the world and we feel mom's presence. This is the 4th baby that has come into our family without our mom but we feel blessed that she is with them before they arrive and I'm sure that they bring a little piece of her with them.
Introducing Carlee. We love her already.

March 12 came and went

2010-03-14T14:59:00.003-07:00

My sweet mom left us at 5 pm on March 12 2007. I never like to make this day anything special or remember it in any way, however the feelings bubble up to the surface even if I don't want them to. I think about what we were doing and feeling. Its unimaginable the things we had to see and hear. We all have to pass through this thing called death, we will all have to experience it. I was glad to be there with my mom holding her hand as she transitioned to her new world. I just miss her and miss the life we could have been having right now. Moving on is a tough concept, this has changed every relationship that I have ever had. I never imagined that there would be people who knew mom who would stop communicating with us after she was gone. But they have, when that link is gone the relationships are gone. Its all very hard. Three years since I have heard her voice or touched her hand or kissed her cheek. I can still remember everything so clearly. I love and miss you mom.

Faith

2010-02-08T21:27:00.002-07:00

Unanswered yet? that prayer your lips have pleaded?
In agony of heart these many years?
Does faith begin to fail; is hope departing,
And think you all in vain those falling tears?
Say not the Father has not heard your prayer;
You shall have your desire sometime,somewhere.

Unanswered Yet? Though when you first presented
This one petition at the Father's throne
It seemed you could not wait the time of asking,
So urgent was your heart to make it known.
Though years have passed since then, do not despair;
The Lord will answer you sometime, somewhere.

Unanswered yet? Nay, do not say ungranted;
Perhaps your own part is not yet whooly done,
The work began when first your prayer was uttered.
And God will finsih what he has begun.
If you will keep the incense burning there,
His glory you shall see sometime, somewhere.

Un answered yet? Faith cannot be unasnwered;
Her feet were firmly planted on the Rock;
Amid the wildest storms she stands undaunted,
Nor quails before the loudest thunder shock
She knows Omnipotence has heard her prayer,
And cries "It shall be done," sometime, somewhere.
-Ophelia G Adams

Christine, Mom, Grandma, Daughter, sister and wife

2010-02-01T12:31:00.003-07:00

If all the skies were sunshine
Our faces would be fain
To feel once more upon them
The cooling splash of rain.
If all the world were music,
Our hearts would often long
For one sweet strain of silence,
To break the endless song.
If life were always merry,
Our souls would seek relief,
And rest from weary laughter
In the quiet arms of grief.
--Henry Van Dyke--

The Things Mom would love

2009-12-11T22:21:00.005-07:00

We all recently went to the So You Think You Can Dance Tour!! Its so amazing. Nothing makes me happier than to watch dance...and dance myself of course which seems to be only in my fantasies these days. My siblings are so supportive of me, every year they pay a lot of money to come to these shows with me and I think they really do it more for me than themselves. Tara, Jenny, and Casey thank you so much for supporting me in something that means so much and makes me so happy. Dancing makes me think of mom. Its the connection only she and I have and it runs so deep. Whenever it came to dancing our souls connected. I miss that. She would love going to these with us. Like me I think nothing made her happier than the expression of dance~! I love you mom. I will always be your little dancer.

Shannybabe

2009-12-11T22:14:00.002-07:00

Another day I dread. I hate to say that because it is my mom's birthday. How can I say that about my moms birthday. The tears started yesterday and continued through today. Jason asked me what I wanted to do today and all I truly wanted to do was get in bed and pull the covers over my head. But when you are mom you never get to do that. So I got up and pushed through the morning. Our hospice nurse Larri became much more than just a nurse to me. She is the only person who saw what we went through and she herself lost her own son when he was 9 years old. Her son Trevor's birthday is tomorrow (the day after my moms). Since I cannot go to St. George to visit my mom's grave I go to Trevor's and visit his and Nurse Larri goes mom's. This year my grandparents (the best in the world) and Jenny came with me to the cemetery and we left balloons on Trevor's grave. I truly feel in my heart I know Trevor and when I see my mom I will see Trevor as well and know him. I feel he's an amazing person! I also have a tradition of buying balloons for each member of my family so each of us get to write a message on the balloon for mom and let it go outside. I want my children to know my mom and know their grandma Chris. We talk to Carter all the time about Grandma Chris. He says all the time she is in Heaven with Jesus and every time I hear the words they penetrate my soul. It is my mission to always know her as if she were here with me and to teach my children of her so they know her as well as they ever could. Another day, another year. I love you mom with all my heart and miss you beyond description. Happy happy Birthday!
Love Your
Shanny Babe

Casey's poem

2009-12-11T11:33:00.002-07:00

"I am feeling very deep right now. Life is full of so much. So many decisions. I am frustrated. I have tried to devote myself and my life to the gospel. My mother got sick, I cried with her, I stood tall as she cried on my shoulder. I shuddered in my room as I heard her cry in pain from afar. I stood by the side of my father as we offered unto her countless blessings. I left her. I took my call of duty to service and left. We cried once again. I served, I did what I was supposed to do . She became worse. I left the vineyard to be by her side. We cried together once more. I left again. I left my dying mother to never see her again in this life. I served the Lord and shared the glad message honorably. I returned home to a changed life. To a motherless life. Things are supposed to work. Things are supposed to go well. My sacrifice should be recognized. But is is not. This is wrong. I should be thankful. I should be thankful for my trials. But right now I am not. My life would be better if my mom were here. I would be better. I would not feel so alone. I pray that this attitude will change. I pray that I may be wrothy of the Spirit to touch and change my heart. I pray that I may stand in holy places and be guided. I pray that there will be those along my path that will recognize my life and challenges. I pray for the day that I will see my mom. My precious mother. My angel mother. I miss you so. Words cannot express. There is a hole. It is everywhere. It grows. It is ever-present. She loved me so much in her mortal life. She offered me so much. My life felt so complete. The pain overwhelms me, but I must go on. I know that if I live worthy, the Lord will bless my life. This is the hope that I hold onto. Right now I feel anger, but hope will always ensue."

Remembering moms birthday

2009-11-23T20:55:00.001-07:00

November 24th is moms 57th birthday. Gone to soon is what keeps echoing in my mind lately. Everyone still struggles a lot with it. I wish I could make it all better. I love my mom and can't wait to see her again. There is always an open wound you carry around with you when you go through this type of thing. The lesson is how to keep living. I think I'm learning slowly.

Mom and dad are so cute!

2009-10-18T15:37:00.000-07:00

Remembering mom and dads anniversary

2009-10-16T18:45:00.002-07:00

My mom and dad are still married even though they are not together anymore in life. I have to keep telling myself that even though its a really easy concept. Sunday will be 35 years. My advice to anyone would be to enjoy your relationships now because you just don't know when there could be a temporary separation. My heart has been hurting a lot lately if I let myself go there. I think missing someone is one of the strongest emotions you can experience. I love my mom and dad and can't wait until they are together again!

It feels heavy right now.

2009-09-09T13:48:00.002-07:00

Mom is coming to my mind a lot lately I feel sad often. I think it must be the time of year or something in the air. I have heard all my siblings tell me they are not doing well right now. I feel so sad, so sad the I'm having another baby that my mom is not here on earth to see. I want her to be here. I know that this spirit that is coming is with her now but It does not comfort me right now. I just want to talk to her and see her. I hope that we will all be together again soon... I am usually trying to see the good in why she had to go... but not today, today I feel sad and mad and lonely, It makes me feel like someone has played the a very mean joke on me and I just want it to all go away. I think it is good to feel what you are feeling and not cover it up and pretend it does not hurt. Because dang it, it does hurt and my heart feels beaten in. Mom why did you have to go?? I hope to find these answers out soon... I'm going to go fall asleep now and dream of her!! sorry so sad

Grandma and Grandpa

2009-09-03T21:49:00.004-07:00

These are my wonderful grandparents and my moms parents. We are so blessed to have them in our lives. Mom loves you Grammy and Grampy!

Man these are some cute kids...

2009-08-28T08:55:00.005-07:00

What beautiful Grandchildren, I think they must have gotten there good looks from one

b-e-a-utiful Grandmother... We love you mom and Grandma!!

Family Reunion

2009-08-12T20:16:00.002-07:00

Well this year its moms turn to head up the family reunion, it was her idea to start the annual reunions on the Record side of the family. She did not even get to attend one of them. We have struggled wanting to be a part of it with her not here. This year we have decided as siblings that we want to represent mom and be in charge of the plans for everyone. We know that is what she wants us to do. The hardest part is when the moms and dads of their families get up and introduce their children and grandchildren...to see their excitement and pride at what they have created. Its just so hard because I know how proud mom would be of us her 4 children and 10 grandchildren. She would beam with joy as she introduced all of us. One of the hardest things has been not to be a part of a family with a mom and dad at the head of it. But we will move on and represent her with pride and joy and we will just have to be proud of ourselves. I know we can do it. Life is about hard things making you stronger.

A new normal

2009-07-08T18:58:00.003-07:00

I can remember when my mom left I thought to myself how can I possibly go on without her. Well you just go to bed and wake up and your still here and you do the best with that day that you know how to.
I miss my morning phone call and the feeling that I had when my family was all gathered together. I miss her holding my kids and looking at them with such love in her eyes. I miss seeing my mom and dad together. Its weird how you get used to things and what you thought was impossible is possible. My mom is helping me I know she calms me down and puts thoughts in my head to help me cope.
I think about that day that we see eachother again and when the pain of her absence with be gone. I can't wait. Maybe it will be sooner than later. Thats a happy thought. Love you mom

Our new family photos

2009-06-29T20:17:00.008-07:00

We were exhausted after our 3 hour photo session, but it was worth it here is a peek at some of the photos. Hope you enjoy!

Our new family photos

2009-06-29T20:17:00.001-07:00

Moms grandchildren

2009-06-29T20:14:00.001-07:00

The Jenkins Kids

Emma, Nicholas, Jay, Tyler

Moms 9th grandchild

2009-05-31T11:01:00.002-07:00

This is mom's 9th grand child and 6th grandson, I wish so bad I could share him with her right now, but I know they spent some good time together before he came to me and I know she visits him.
Tyler Christian Jenkins 7lbs 13 oz 19.5 inches long born April 27th

2009-05-10T20:54:00.002-07:00

Happy mothers Day to my dear mom

This is the 3rd mothers day that we have spent apart, I miss you so much mom and wish I could share my new baby with you. I know that you know and love him and prepared him well before he came to us. I wish there was a way we could all stay together and never leave eachother, thats how it will be in the next life and I can't wait. Love you mom I miss you so much. Love Tara

Giving Comfort

2009-04-05T16:37:00.002-07:00

I read this in the readers digest and I thought it was perfect to the way I feel and what I have learned.

"I have a set of lessons learned about how to console those who have suffered a loss, based on my own personal experience and observation over the years.

First go to the funeral. Thirty years ago, mayor richard lee of new haven connectictu, told me that he always went to funerals. It's there that you see people, he said, and that they see you. It's there that you mingle with families, listen to them talk, and lend your full support. I had never heard that advice stated so explicitly, but he was exactly right. Death opens an enormous hole in the heart. A funeral service brings together those who can help fill that hole.

Second, call or write your friend when someone close to her or him had died. It is remarkable how few people actually reach out in tough times. Perhaps they don't know what to say; perhaps they think the person would prefer to be left alone. It is better to try and be rejected than to never try at all. Your friend can always resist the effort not answer the phone, not open the letter. But it is hard to imagine anyone not appreciateing it.

Third, never say "you will get over it." People rarely do.

The death of a loved one rips us apart, shakes us up , hurts terribly. So my fourth tip is to embrace the person who suffers. I think of the kiss my mother would give me when I would scrape my knee or cut my finger. Her act of love was more healing than any antiseptic.

Make it clear in the letter or phone call to your friend that she or he is wonderful. The outstretched arm, the warm embrace, the freshly baked cookies, or the frgrant flowers do not replace the life. Not by any means. But they do say to the grieving friend, "you are loved.
You are cherished. "

These are some of the best words I have heard and I have learned a lot going through this experience and I will follow this council whenever I know someone who suffers from a death. I know those people who did reach out helped so much. Love Tara

2009-03-16T08:33:00.002-07:00

March 12 was the day my mom passed away 2 years ago. Oh boy what a hard day to get through, I mean every day seems challenging, some days are way worse than others. Its hard to think back to that awful day 2 years ago.... The things I had to see and feel where indescribable. You know I wanted her to be out of her pain and away from the body that stopped working for her. At the same time I did not want her to leave me. I would lay by her and sing hymns to her hoping that this would comfort her in some way. I also sat there and whispered to her in her ear that its "Its ok mom you can go we will be o.k. " The nurse said that maybe she was hanging on for us, and we needed to tell her that we would be ok. I also just wanted to hear her tell me she loved me one more time, not that I didn't here this like 50 million times in my life cause I did. My mom always told me how wonderful I am and how much she loves me every time we talked. She used to say "Jenny your so amazing, you can do anything." Man how awesome that she thought I was so great!! There are lots of memories I have of that day most of them sad. After she passed, I left the house by my self so I could cry alone. I said to her in my head," Mom why did you have to go, I miss you." And then as clear as day I heard in my head her answer me and say, " I did all I was supposed to do," Then I said in my head, " I love you mom" and she answered me back saying, " I love you too" It was a really amazing moment for me. I still feel her around me at times. Sometimes I'll be sitting there and I swear there is someone behind me or by me. She did tell me when she was very sick, "I don't know how it all works up there, but I will be with you as much as I can."

When my mom and I would see each other I was always really silly with her, I loved to make her laugh. I would tickle her, (she is so ticklish, ) I always used to pick her up cause I was alot taller than her and she was always so skinny. She would laugh, and scream it was so much fun. I think about when I see her again sometimes, I think I will pick her up and she will laugh and we will laugh and it will be a sweet reunion. (Thank you for listening)

I miss you

2009-01-29T11:33:00.002-07:00

There hasn't been anything posted in such a long time I had to get on and say how much I miss you mom. It doesn't get easier and it doesn't go away how much I want things to be back the way they were. I still can't believe we have to go on living without mom. Everyone else moves on and the sting goes away but for the people closest it never leaves. I guess thats what the definition of a trial is. At least I can say when I get up to heaven to some of those great prophets and people up there that I have gone through the depths of what life can bring you and I am worthy to be with them because of the pains and trials I had to go through in life. Hopefully I am learning and growing, although it doesn't always feel that way. Miss you and love you mom.

MEMORIES OF CHRISTINE

2008-11-24T20:46:00.004-07:00

Today we celebrate the day that a beautiful soul came into this world and changed our lives. As I thought about Christine today, I decided to go back to the beginning and ask Mom and Dad what they remember about this day, 56 years ago.

Mom - It began about 3 or so in the morning, Mom had to call Dad at work because he was working graveyard shift and wasn't there. She said "you better come home and take me to the hospital". Grandma Record came over to stay with David, Mike and Susan. Her labor lasted about 5 or 6 hours, about normal she said. She does remember that Dad fell kept falling asleep between contractions. When it was time to deliver Dad was sent to the waiting room with all the other fathers and Mom went off to the delivery room, all by herself. Our beautiful Christine was born about 8:00 am. She was 5 lbs and 13 oz and had more hair than any of the rest of us, and it was curly. She was adorable. After the delivery Mom's uterus wouldn't contract so the Dr. sat by her bed and massaged for hours. When he had to leave the nurse took over, they were afraid she would hemorage. That was a very painful ordeal and she felt awful and apparently look about the same. Grandma Ruff left the hospital and cried all the way home. But by the time Grandma Ruff came back that evening with something cute and pink for Christine, Mom was sitting up in bed with her makeup on, feeling and looking much better.

Dad - "I don't remember much....I was tired". (We love you Dad!)

I don't remember that day obviously because I wasn't born yet, but I know I was in heaven feeling very sad because I was saying goodbye to my best friend and sister. But happy at the same time because I knew I would be seeing her again, very soon. Just how I feel now, so very sad that I had to say goodbye to my best friend and sister but confident that she's in a beautiful place with all of our loved ones that have gone before her, and I will see her again. Happy Birthday Christine, I love you.

56th birthday

2008-11-24T16:09:00.001-07:00

I got the number wrong its 56th birthday love you mom.

Happy Birthday Mom!

2008-11-24T16:00:00.001-07:00

Today is mom's 55th birthday. I miss you so much mom. Happy Birthday my beautiful mom. We love you.

He's home

2008-11-20T20:32:00.001-07:00

Casey brought such a nice spirit back with him. Its great to have him home. The stake president told me that he thinks that mom was very needed with Casey on his mission and that now that he is home we will feel her presence more. I think that is true and I have definately felt a nice peace and happiness with his return. Miss you mom.

Missing you

2008-11-03T13:12:00.002-07:00

Casey is coming home tomarrow. These last few days have been hard. I have dreamt about mom everynight. We have all anticipated this reunion and hoped that mom would be a part of it. I know she will be there. I wish it was physically. I was thinking about the fullness of joy and I think you cannot feel that in your life as long as someone is missing. We will not feel that again until we are all reunited. Its happy and we love to be together but there is always someone missing. I miss you mom I hope we will feel your presence with us as casey comes home.

35th wedding anniversary

2008-10-28T13:44:00.001-07:00

October 18th was mom and dads 35 wedding anniversary. I wanted to acknowledge it. Happy Anniversary mom and dad!

The countdown

2008-10-26T09:38:00.000-07:00

9 days and counting.

Mom

2008-10-23T10:21:00.002-07:00

One of the hardest things that people say is that mom is a memory or that I have her in my memories. I want to shout out with all my voice and say she is not a memory she is real, she is happy, she is working hard and she is definately existing. I know this as surely as I know anything. Our relationships keep going even though we are separated for a time. Love you mom.

Spiritual thoughts to feed our souls!!!

2008-10-22T22:07:00.004-07:00

I have been wanting to bring a little more spiritual meaning into my life, and decided to look online at some conference talks by our beloved apostles. I read these talks from Ezra Taft Benson and Pres. Monson, wanted to share with all of you. .........Life is eternal. We are eternal beings. We lived as intelligent spirits before this mortal life. We are now living part of eternity. Our mortal birth was not the beginning. Death, which faces all of us, is not the end.
As eternal beings, we each have in us a spark of divinity. As one who has traveled over much of this world, I am convinced that our Father’s children are essentially good. They want to live in peace. They want to be good neighbors. They love their homes and their families. They want to improve their standards of living. They want to do what is right, and I know that God loves them.There is the ever-present expectancy of death, but in reality there is no death—no permanent parting. The resurrection is a reality. The scriptures are replete with evidence. Almost immediately after the glorious resurrection of the Lord, Matthew records: “And the graves were opened; and many bodies of the saints which slept arose, And came out of the graves after his resurrection, and went into the holy city, and appeared unto many.” (Matt. 27:52–53.)
The spirit world is not far away. Sometimes the veil between this life and the life beyond becomes very thin. Our loved ones who have passed on are not far from us.
The prophet Brigham Young asked, “Where is the spirit world?” and then answered his own question:
“It is right here. … Do [spirits] go beyond the boundaries of this organized earth? No, they do not. They are brought forth upon this earth, for the express purpose of inhabiting it to all eternity.” (Journal of Discourses, 3:369.)
“When the spirits leave their bodies they are in the presence of our Father and God, they are prepared then to see, hear and understand spiritual things . … If the Lord would permit it, and it was His will that it should be done, you could see the spirits that have departed from this world, as plainly as you now see bodies with your natural eyes.” (Journal of Discourses, 3:368.) President Ezra Taft Benson “Death is not what some people imagine. It is only like going into another room. In that other room we shall find … the dear women and men and the sweet children we have loved and lost.”7 Pres. Monson

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2008-10-21T13:58:00.001-07:00

Our boy is coming home!

2008-10-09T13:45:00.002-07:00

Yes its almost time two long years have gone by and we are counting down 23 days to go. Casey will be coming home on November 4th. I know mom would be especially gitty right now for his return. Mom and Casey have a really special bond. I wonder if mom knows about and it and how she is feeling. We can't wait to have Casey back.

Our early family

2008-09-16T09:14:00.001-07:00

I love this picture of our early family everyone looks so happy. Some of my favorite memories are of mom with big hair.

Not Gone

2008-09-08T15:29:00.001-07:00

I don't feel that my mom is gone. I feel so strongly that she has stepped threw a door in the next room. I know she is close to us, she hears us and knows of our trials and hardships, with her gone. Its so hard to have the faith to see past our pain to something more, we will have the eternities to hug her, to listen to her sweet voice. I will be able to make her laugh for as long as I desire. She is not gone, please don't think this. She is right there, sometimes I sense her like she is next to me looking at me. Telling me my hair is beautiful, or how amazing she thinks I am. She loves us all so much, even more than she did on earth (if that is possible). We will see her soon, we all need to hold strong until that day!!

Thoughts

2008-09-08T15:23:00.002-07:00

I was having some deep thoughts today about mom and about life I wanted to share them with you. There are lots of days that I spend the day thinking about what it would be like if mom were here, what would we be talking about, what plans would we be making and what new news would I be sharing with her. These days I feel down because of all the things I feel I don't have...... Life has many more challenges today than it did, this forces me everyday to dig deep and find the peace that seems to not be there, to find the comtentment that is missing. I discovered today that because of this daily search for peace and meaning that I may be more blessed than those without this driving force. I know more, I feel more, I am more. When mom passed I took one step into heaven with her because we are bound by being mother and daughter she is guiding me with all the knowledge that she now has. Today I feel lucky.

Memories of Home

2008-08-18T23:37:00.009-07:00

Helping Tara prepare this blog has brought back many memories. Waves of sadness, love, and tenderness have crashed down on my soul, loosing floodgates of tears so often held back in order to strengthen others. Yet, Chris's memory, especially many of my first ones of her, still the tears and bring peace to my soul. I love you Chris! Oh how I wish I had said it more often when she was here; but I know she knew how much. Tears still well up like great reservoirs of regret when I wish I could have been with her at the end. I digress. I do not wish to think of the end - but the beginning. Chris, you hold a special place in my heart. You were truly a mother to me. Coming to visit always felt like coming home.

Since Chris left, I have been blessed to feel her near on a few occassions. During one blessing in particular that I was giving Tara, I not only felt her next to me but I knew her thoughts and felt her feelings. I have never felt anything that spiritual so strong before or since. The spirit overwhelmed me, and I KNEW how much she loves her children. I can say of assurety that she loves her family, that she is aware of your thoughts, your feelings, and your events. I look forward to the day I embrace her again, and hope that I on that day I will make her proud of me for the life I have led. I know it will feel like coming home.

Love - Joe

2008-08-17T20:59:00.001-07:00